Chapter 5, part 4: Declutter Your Mind from A Book in Time

Published on 15 September 2022 at 16:08

According to Tiffany:

Be your own best friend. Take some time for yourself, challenge your insecurities to new lengths, and be your support person.


Tiffany's Strategies for Becoming Your Own Best Friend:

1.)  Be kind to yourself. Build yourself up; set realistic goals; let go of perfectionism.

2.)  Hold firm boundaries to your own needs. Don't ignore or push aside these needs.

3.)  Take a step back.  Mindfulness practice helps achieve this.

4.)  Be compassionate and forgiving of your own pain.

5.)  Compliment yourself.

6.)  Be aware of the things that distract you.

7.)  Be tough on yourself in the right way.  Don't fall back into bad habits.


Write a letter to yourself to get inspired. Make it encouraging and uplifting.


A Book in Time's Commentary:


Professionally:  Boundaries are guidelines that you establish. It is very important to set clear boundaries in your business or workplace. This will help to eliminate many potential issues, helps prevent you from being taken advantage of, and may even allow you to be more effective in all you do. Sometimes when you are a new employee or just starting a business, it is easy to be zealous and perhaps inclined to over-deliver. It is admirable to be energized and ambitious, and giving your best in your performance is always advantageous. However, if you give too much, you risk fatigue or burnout, may become careless or sloppy in your performance, and potentially may build resentment. Whether as an employee or a business owner, it's up to you to set your own boundaries. Boundaries vary widely, and some include contact, time, service, task, cancellation and refund, alignment, and personal boundaries, according to As you enforce your established perimeter, you become more confident, and the confines become more comfortable, possibly even developing into a habit. Established boundaries provide a clear way to communicate your expectations. Having them will help eliminate misunderstandings and confusion. By setting business boundaries, you are able to have the best of both worlds; your business and personal life. Define your objectives and use them as a guide for your boundaries. Do not allow anything to occur outside of these objectives intentionally. You may even consider implementing policies to help better establish your guidelines. Review your boundaries periodically and make necessary adjustments to ensure they remain relevant. Boundaries are essential in business to protect yourself from overextension, build long-term relationships, and grow a healthy business.


" 'No' is a complete sentence."

Annie Lamott


"The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say 'No' to almost everything."

Warren Buffet


"Compassionate people ask for what they need. They say no when they need to, and when they say yes, they mean it. They're compassionate because their boundaries keep them out of resentment."

Brene Brown


"The type of person you are is usually reflected in your business. To improve your business, first improve yourself."

Idowu Kovenikan


Personally:  Establishing personal boundaries is essential to your health and the health of your relationships. They allow you to determine how you want to be treated and what you will tolerate. You are able to design a framework within your environment and how you accept the world around you. Many people do not understand what boundaries are. You are responsible for establishing and making known to them what you will or will not endure. It is not always evident when a boundary is being crossed. However, you may find yourself feeling uncomfortable in a given situation. Trust your intuition and take control of your immediate environment. This may very well bring the present occurrence back to a healthy relationship with a clear understanding of how you want to be treated. Unfortunately, in our culture, narcissists are notorious for violating boundaries. They are self-absorbed and feel entitled to your space. Many other toxic people have the potential to affect your boundaries. Make yourself aware of people inclined to manipulate you and violate your boundaries. Be assertive and stand your ground.


 "When you notice someone does something toxic the first time, don't wait for a second time before you address it or cut them off. Many survivors are used to the 'wait and see' tactic which only leaves them vulnerable to a second attack. As your boundaries get stronger, the wait time gets shorter. You never have to justify your intuition."

Shahida Arabi


"Lack of boundaries invites lack of respect."



 "Boundaries define us. They define what is me and what is not me. A boundary shows me where I end and someone else begins, leading me to a sense of ownership. Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom."

Henry Cloud


"Your personal boundaries protect the inner core of your identity and your right to choices."

Gerard Manley Hopkins


"Boundaries are part of self-care. They are healthy, normal, and necessary."

Doreen Virtue


Spiritually:  "Our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are intimately tied into how we view our worthiness and value as human beings," from People with positive self-worth tend to have greater self-confidence and self-esteem. Self-worth is affected by thoughts, feelings, emotions, experiences, interactions, beliefs, values, health, etc. Positive self-worth can help you set boundaries and is generally paired with a stronger sense of confidence. You are less likely to allow shortcomings to define your identity. You may also be more likely to pursue different opportunities and try new things. Respecting yourself can help gain the respect of others. There are many ways to improve your sense of self-worth, such as engaging in activities you excel in, challenging yourself to strive for more, rewarding yourself when this happens, educating yourself even further in your field or favorite activity, practicing to become better in something and work on eliminating your negative thoughts and improving the view of yourself. Empower those around you and build up others. It is difficult to feel low about yourself when you are serving others. Transform the energy that surrounds you to a high-frequency level and allow it to elevate you and positively affect those around you.


"We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves."

Malcolm X

Accept who you are through Jesus Christ.  


"As long as you look for someone else to validate who you are by seeking their approval, you are setting yourself up for disaster."

Nic Sheff


Only God is whole and complete. It is through Him that we receive strength and the ability to succeed.


"Never let yourself be defined by someone else's opinion."



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